is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Randomize
