i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
found the other keg... it's in the tree
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
