Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
