It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
