He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I party with great urgency now.
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