They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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