we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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