508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
