I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm determined to sit on that face.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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