uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize