sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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