i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize