yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
