I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
