no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
That accounts for only three of the penises
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
