I am midnight drunk by noon
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Randomize
