Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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