After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
