Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
