everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
