It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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