Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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