just survived the first fart of the relationship.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
