I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Randomize