Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
The air was thick with penises
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
God, I missed his penis.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
