apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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