i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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