She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
