i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
