it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
