I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
