Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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