I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Randomize
