If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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