dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
