I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize