Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Boobs are out for the taking
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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