We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
