Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
