What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
