I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Let's get the cat blown out
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
