my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
