if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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