im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I looked at my own cervix.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
