Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize