She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
