It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
