I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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