hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
