I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
