i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
