just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
